Self Time – A Heartfelt Letter to Amma & a Mom’s Joyful Escape

Self Time is not a luxury—it’s a necessity. In this heartfelt letter, a mom writes to her own mother about a rare moment of freedom, joy, and self-celebration. For years, she put her family first. But this time, she chose herself. Dive into this emotional story that reminds us all why self time matters so much, especially for mothers in joint families.

Dear Amma,

Hope you are doing good. You know what—today, I am so happy. Finally, I’ve won over a major discussion. Guess what?

I’m going to the reunion of our schoolmates!
Yes, Amma, Sriram (my hubby) has agreed to take care of the kids. Can you believe it?

He had to go on an office tour on that Sunday. Thank God, Amma, his boss informed him that it’s scheduled for the next weekend instead. And you know what else? My in-laws are going to Arun’s home (Sriram’s brother) for two whole weeks. So, even that tension—gone!

And moreover, Varsha and Vaibhav’s exams are over. I feel relieved, Amma—there’s nothing to worry about now.

Now no one can stop me from enjoying with my friends.

I Remember What You Said About “Self Time”

Amma, how you always felt that I couldn’t get any free time from my family. How many times you said that my life was becoming just like yours? You were right.

You have not got any free time leave alone “me time.” You never knew what was that.

Every single day looked the same. You woke up early, finished all the chores, cooked for us, helped with our homework, took care of our health, our emotions—and never once thought about what you wanted.

You worked so hard to keep us happy and satisfied.

You missed your self-time, but you never complained. You simply accepted it as your duty.

Also read: My Me Time Is To Show Myself Some Love..

You Were the Silent Superwoman

You used to prepare so much food—hot, fresh, and delicious. And you always made sure both Karthik (my brother) and I had our favourite dishes. He was completely different from me when it came to food, but you never took sides.

And Appa? He was always on some kind of diet. You cooked separately for him too.

How did you do all of this single-handedly, Amma? I wonder now, being a mother myself. I have a maid to help me with the work, but still, I feel tired and stretched.

You cultivated good qualities in us—not by lecturing, but by living those values.

You may not have had ‘n’ number of degrees behind your name, but you were truly a master of many things.

This Time, I Chose Me & My Self Time

But Mumma, today I am happy. I’m finally going to make it to something just for myself.

So many years have passed without me going anywhere alone. A joint family, two kids, responsibilities—it all left me without a choice.

But today is different.

This time, I will enjoy my self-time to the fullest. And next time I write to you, Amma, I promise to share more such “me time” moments. I know you’ll be happy hearing that I finally did something for me.

C u ma, regards to Appa
Will msg you later, bye

The Sunday That Changed Everything

A Morning Just for Me

Finally, the Sunday had arrived.

I was super excited and got up from bed at 6 a.m. Everyone else was still sleeping. The house was quiet—so peaceful. I tiptoed into the kitchen and made myself a strong coffee.

I felt happy sipping every drop. I felt a joy I hadn’t experienced in years.

Today was mine.

Today I am going to do something new, yes, I am going to meet my old friends after years—without worrying about lunch, homework, groceries, or anything else. The feeling was great!!.

“You Are Glowing!”

Later, my husband got up. He looked at me and whispered, “You are glowing!”

I smiled and my husband and kids bid me good bye.
I felt as if I was flying in the air. That lightness—that thrill—it was magical.

Every Mom Deserves This Feeling of Self Time

Though this “me time” meant meeting friends, even being alone would’ve felt equally refreshing.

This time wasn’t about just catching up or taking selfies. It was about reconnecting with myself, about reminding myself that I still exist beyond my roles of wife, mother, daughter-in-law.

This self-time was a grand affair—an emotional vacation for the soul. And Amma, I now truly understand:

Every mom should have this.
Every mom needs this.

It boosts our energy, our confidence, and our identity.

Why Do Moms in Joint Families Struggle to Find Self Time?

In joint families, responsibilities are often shared—but for mothers, they tend to multiply. Between managing children, in-laws, meals, and social expectations, most moms don’t even realise when their personal time quietly disappears. The idea of taking self time feels like a luxury, or worse, a selfish act. But the truth is, it’s not about escaping your duties—it’s about recharging yourself so you can fulfill them better.

When everything revolves around others, even asking for a break can bring guilt. But that guilt is misplaced. Every mom deserves some self time to breathe, reflect, and reconnect with herself.

Can Taking Self Time Make You a Better Mother?

Yes, absolutely! When a mother gives herself permission to pause and focus on her own well-being, she returns to her family feeling refreshed and more present. Self time allows emotional regulation, reduces burnout, and increases patience—qualities every child needs in a parent.

Moms who take time for themselves are not neglecting their family—they are nurturing it from a place of strength. Remember, you can’t pour from an empty cup. A few minutes of reading, a solo coffee, or a walk in peace can help restore balance and joy.

A Note to Every Mother Reading This

If you’re reading this and wondering when your “self time” will come, let me tell you: create it. Don’t wait for the perfect conditions. They may never come.

Even a few minutes alone with your thoughts, a walk in silence, or coffee with friends—it counts. You matter too.

Don’t wait for permission to celebrate yourself.

Until Next Time, Amma…

I’ll message you later, Amma. Sending love to you and regards to Appa.
I’m so excited to share more self-time moments soon.

And I promise—this is just the beginning.

Friends, if you loved this story, do like, comment, and share with a mom who needs a reminder that her self-time is important too.

The blog was originally published on June 11, 2021 · Updated on August 8, 2025 to help more moms discover this story.

Related read: Baby step towards me-time

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